A birdhouse complete with bird food, and two lovely marigolds. I'm so bad with the flowers. I will try for my sons sake to make them live. I almost gave them away already to someone I knew could care for them. My grandmother was the lucky one in years past but she is gone now so maybe I'm going to have to give it another go. Vale dirt is so different and difficult compared to the heavenly soil I was raised on.
The kids peppered me with what my favorite desserts are and what my favorite food is. honestly I make what I'm in the mood for, I don't hold back a lot on any of it being pregnant and nursing I have to go with what I can stomach and or the baby tolerates. So they have to suffer through lots of rice (this pregnancy) and Mexican food when I'm missing the spicy deliciousness I can't stand potatoes and gravy anymore. Likewise, I endure spaghetti and fettuccine both of which make me gag at the thought, but in the end are ok to call a meal when all is said and done. I laughed when John named his two or three favorite desserts and demanded I choose. I told him none of those were my favorite he said "that's ok just choose one." Yep that's being a mom.
The best thing I get is learning and growing with all these hooligans. I'm not the type of mom who exclaims with tears and unabashed enthusiasm that I love being a mom. I've spent a lot of time wondering why I just don't conjure up those feelings. I love each child, I have chosen this path and I know it's right for me I think to me extreme emotion is just not practical or available. I'm doing the job. I'm trying to do a good job. I'm holding the fort and keeping the stockade alive. I try to support them in things that will benefit them and introduce them to opportunities where they can learn and grow and become better.
When I think about being a mother I think it is a lot of sacrifice and my love and passion is shown in the fact I don't jump ship and don't give up or quit. I work hard to notice and pay attention to needs both the first three primary- food shelter water- and then the next love, security, learning? (I might have made those up). Those 6 necessities pretty much consume my existence. So do I love being a mother yep cuz I do it.
My little babies are getting big and my most recent babies are getting independent. I think this time may be passing even more quickly than I realize.
Tonight as I enjoyed and savored every moment of 3 bodies massaging my tired feet and legs I thought this is glorious! They are wonderful, messy, hungry, invigorating, giving, loving gifts from a much more Knowledgeable God who knew when He gave women this responsibility He was actually giving them an endless supply of learning and love. God is good and so is motherhood.
No comments:
Post a Comment