1.31.23 So blessed

 I had another doctor appointment last week. I'm just patiently waiting for each next doctor appointment. This one was such a relief. I had made a list of worries and questions. The doctor patiently and thoroughly answered each query I posed. Her explanations further solidified my peace and hope that this is just an experience to pass through. I'm looking at it like a C-section, which I survived just fine. 

This will not be life ending, this is not genetic thus my siblings and children will not necessarily also have this experience. This is not urgent, if it is cancer it is slow growing. That word cancer really was hard to say. It gripped my heart and mind and whipped them from here to there. In our church congregation we knew and watched several battle for years and eventually succumb to their respective cancers. In the days prior to the visit I had to get ahold of my heart and mind and anchor in the me now. In the today. Today I have this to do. Today I am not dying. Today I am healthy. Today I will do what I need to. I will not worry about the tomorrow in the future I will not cry about the maybe I will be in what I know today. 

So next appointment in two weeks with the surgeon who thankfully I have been okayed to work with in Boise. I was thinking I may have to go to Portland Oregon to the university hospital but so much more convenient and supported is Boise. Greg is not a doctor or hospital fan ... I know this and I'm trying to make this is as smooth and comfortable for my large family as possible. I will be more at ease knowing they are peaceful. 

I got word yesterday that Anna will be released on March 29th. I hope to have completed the surgery before then but will see after talking with the surgeon. I am aware of the many blessings that are mine and the many prayers offered in my behalf. Thank you. It will all be ok! And today I have enough to do. Life is grand and I am blessed!

1.31.23 A potato Party

Mark and John shared that there was a rumored potato project happening in town and that anyone that wanted to work would be paid $20 and hour for emptying French fried. Greg made some calls and verified this was true. Mark and John went to work. We called a while later and again confirmed any who wanted to work were welcome. We got some warm clothes and boots on and loaded up in the van. This is what we found. We worked for an hour on Friday. 

Merle and Lia weren't a lot of help with the emptying bags but they were good at carrying boxes. So we walked back and forth feeding the fire. 

When the boxes were empty everyone pitched in. The young men worked to carry the most boxes in one trip. 

Merle was a bit tired but he and Lia had worked steady and I was pleased with their effort. 

The next day we worked on dumping hashbrowns. This was harder than fries. We put in 4 hours on Saturday. Merle and Lia were not so happy at this project. 

We had taken lunch to the boys but couldn't leave when we saw 2 semis and only about 12 people. It takes  alot of time to open the boxes split the bags and close the box with the bag inside. We were thankful for the bacon gift as fried rice is one of our favorite meals. 

Addie was tackling this project sorting through our piles of coats and winter gear. Removing me from stopping her purging helps the project get done and truly we have to get rid of somethings or we won't be able to move. 

Of course after church we had to sample the fries. They were delicious. We never order fries when we eat out so this was a special treat. 

 The 6 lb bag was just right for our hungry crew. Mark dutifully cooked and cooked so everyone got their fill. The story is there was a live fly in two of the train cars so the entire shipment was condemned. Now it must be understood the fries are in sealed plastic bags, in a glued together cardboard box which is then wrapped in plastic wrap. Flies do not bore and eat into those protections. The amount of waste is staggering. Thankfully we live in an animal area so 99% will be fed to animals. 

I am thankful to have time and opportunity to work with my kids to help them stay engaged. All the other workers were kind and helpful in working with us. They would drop boxes off the stacks for us to open on the ground. They didn't throw boxes on us. They let us dump their open bags, the visited with the kids. It was a good experience. The girls want to use their money for horse riding lessons this summer. It's so good to be able to earn the money or things you want to do. Life is good we didn't freeze in the blowing snow and the opening of frozen food, and we didn't blow away in the wind. All survived and are better for it. We are blessed. 

1.29.23 FFA speaking

Last week started off the speaking season in a major way. Tuesday was the first round with the soil and water conservation district. These two were ready to roll and spoke very well. This evening was a superb teaching and learning experience for the kids. They were able to watch each other present and then answer questions. 

Our friend Riley also competed that night. 

At the end of the night all the kids lined up for a picture. After the smiles the awards were given. First off every contestant was gifted a $20.00 certificate to the local A & W by the judges. Then the placings Mark was 3rd, the young man on the left was 2nd, and Riley placed 1st. 

The next day Mark and Addie participated in the district officer election process. Addie was on the nominating committee and learned a lot, then Mark was running and ended up as the alternate. 

Thursday after a full day of doctors and shopping Addie won Creed speaking. Mark, John, Addie and Riley were the only speakers in their divisions. 

Every night we listen to speeches. We try to think of a question or two, we encourage animation, hand movement. No doubt about it we are busy in the evenings. Sometimes I'm sleeping, sometimes I'm wide awake. The kids have spoken at the 4-h meeting, they are going to the Lions club this week and talking with the toastmasters. Life is full of learning. They are great kids and we appreciate the support and encouragement of family and friends and community members.  

1.25.23 learning lessons

 I'm so impatient I want things fast! This waiting has taught me that in the fast we miss the lessons. As I've shared the first few weeks were full of worry and fear. But as time and days drag on I'm more at peace and resolved that this is another experience I will go through. As I told Greg we all have to have a way out but it's not right now, this is an experience. I'm thankful for time to receive peace. To talk to those who are also on this path and learn from their journey. 

I've learned the importance of saying outloud my fears but also stating that has not been said and I'm not going there because it is not true to me right now. To label them as baseless fears and to put them out of my path. This has been powerful. I've shared with a few people and I'm to the point of not crying in the intial reveal but as I share a fear or two that's when the tears come. Then I remind myself those aren't verified as my lot and thus don't need to worry about them today. That's helpful. 

We had a unique experience helping a lonely lady go to the hospital last week. This was a tender mercy to help her, and to be reminded that hospitals are not new territory nor are they to be dreaded. 

An interesting insight was seperating this from my previous pregnancy journeys. The thought as I was tidying up is my stomach doesn't hurt. When I was far along pregnant bending over was a dreaded chore, it hurt everytime. This is not that. I don't feel bad. I feel normal me. I can do what I need to. There's plenty of projects to put my time into. I'm considering painting my inside house. We shall see. 

I'm thankful for the many prayers on my behalf. I'm thankful for the well wishes and kind thoughts. I was thankful to get an appointment with the surgeon so we will work through speaking season and then head to the surgeon. 

1.24.23 Addie and Livy

One of the teachers loves to assign large artistic projects for the end of each quarter. I am finding Addie's large brain needs lots and lots of outlets. She helped Livy create the illustrated box. Livy is a willing student learning from Addie and dutifully working for her approval. 

The completed box. They had to paint a representative picture for several characters in the book and then find a quote that supported the  picture. 

 The busy Addie also started her 2023 speaking schedule with the American Legion contest. She had a surprising amount memorized and after loosing her spot once recovered and moved on. All this shall be added to your experience. I'm so pleased she is willing to challenge herself. She will improve each day this week as she competes in each. Tuesday with soil and water then thursday with chapter. The kids started earlier and have put in more time polishing and considering their topics. 

She is finding her balance and flow on stage in front of people. I was excited to see double the number of people at the local legion as last year. This contest has sparked new life in that organization. They awarded Addie more money than Aliza got, which was generous and welcome as Addie is very motivated by money. 

A quick fuel up before she went. We still have to figure out her hair. It's funny to listen to Livy scold Addie for not liking make-up and passing on the opportunity to wear jewelry especially ear rings. Oh well to each their own. Life is good. I'm thankful this lady is finally finding her spot to become her best self. She needs A Lot going on to use all her resources. I let her be and listen when she shares and she is happy and helpful. We are blessed!

1.23.23 Pictures to paint and a full Sunday

One goal of mine is to learn to paint. I spend a lot of time watching tutorials trying to find what I want to attempt. Afton was the lone big kid last week while her sisters attended their art class. She's in a tough spot right now trying to make sense of the ever increasing expectations at school and being slightly lost in the swirl of academics. We skipped the dishes and the dinner and painted a lion together. Lions are her favorite animal right now. I'm so thankful for the many artists who have provided tutorials that allow for success. I'm thankful for time to spend with her doing what she wanted. 

Then I made dinner. We were blessed with some red, yukon, and russet potatoes. As food prices sky rocket and eating desires remain staples like these are doubly appreciated. 

We now have early church. Trying to make constructive use of the long Sunday afternoon is a weekly challenge. My friend shared she was going to paint a valentines decoration. I'm not much of a heart person but I thought that sounded like a good idea for the many busy hands I have in my house. Thus each kid got to design a new decoration picture for our house. 

Merle and Lia painted in hearts I drew for them. 

Afton and Bruce painted heart trees. 

Livy and Millie worked independently on designs of their choice. This was a big project for one mom to take on. 

 I love her get it done ability. Art classes have helped her and Millie learn technique and color. It has also helped them know a great lady who is inspiring and encouraging. I lament we don't do piano, that's all on me I'm not willing to throw money at such a daily fight and power struggle between my girls and me. So art it is.  

Millie finished our evening with a depression era crazy cake. It was delicious despite having no eggs or butter or milk! Sad we are entering into depression/war style living with groceries being too expensive to indulge in more than necessary. Dessert is not necessary. 

Andrea loves chocolate and approved of the cake!

The guys came late to dinner as usual. A cow had got stuck in a deep hole filled with manure and thus they spent hours pulling shoveling and cajoling her out. They reeked of manure. No meal is made better with that smell around. So they scrubbed, wiped, and washed the mess to make our house pleasant again. Andrea enjoyed getting tomatoes from her dad for a night time snack. She's absolutely charming right now. We are sure thankful for her. 

And that's a wrap a long stake conference. Kids who were just too tired to sit through it. Home to watch church movies till their brains fall out, a family meeting that was chaotic and loud yet punctuated by some powerful truths of staying close to God no matter what. I'm thankful for opportunities to teach and work with my kids. After the youngers were finally in bed we spent an hour with the high schoolers hearing speeches, and the state degree slide show, asking questions and learning together. Life is good and full and for that I am thankful!

1.19.23 Magnum Opus

Charlotte in Charlotte's Web made this phrase immortal. Her great life work was her egg sack. Making babies that would follow after her. The great charge of the earth is to multiply and replenish. These kiddos are my magnum opus. It took me into my 40's to realize this was indeed what great work God was asking me to do. It's a process, it's a challenge, there's lots of leave me alone, be quiet, and stop and no! But they will my heart with joy and fulfillment. I am truly blessed by the people in my life.

Millie, John, Reed etc are encouraging this lady to walk. She's standing independently, but not stepping yet. 

On a loan warm day we went outside to oversee some of the work happening there. 

Many trees mean branch and leaf pickup is a constant chore. Thankfully the weather was around 40 one day and we did more work on yard maitanence. 

A blessing of big family life is always having someone to ding around with. 

For some reason the kids are caught up on the brown heads versus the red heads. These are my brown hair boys. and a quick snap of my red head guys. 

 We are blessed with time and with knowledge. We are diligently working on speeches and contests. More and more training of each kid in their time and space. We check a few off and start anew with the next. Along the way Greg and I learn more about what it takes to be successful. Rules and requirements change and broaden. Various kids show more aptitude and willingness but all must learn the skill. Life is good.